Book Review - Beyond the Down Low : Sex, Lies, and Denial in Black America

Bolstered by national television exposure on Oprah and a cover story in the New York Times Magazine, the "down low"-a term used to refer to "straight" men who have sex with men-was thrust into the open in 2004. Keith Boykin, a former Clinton White House aide, goes beyond the hype with the first responsible, eye-opening look at the down low sensation. Unlike all previous accounts on the topic, Beyond the Down Low presents the DL not merely as a problem of gay and bisexual men living in the shadows, but more as an example of America's unwillingness to engage in critical but uncomfortable conversations about black sexuality. Boykin details how society has helped to create an environment where black gay and bisexual men feel compelled to lead double lives. Meanwhile, the dialogue that has taken place in the black community encourages an unhealthy battle of the sexes, ignores the complexity of the closet, demonizes bisexuality, disempowers women, and misdirects public resources and attention. This book is a timely and well researched answer to the question, "Why are so many black men on the DL?" More importantly, it is an essential tool to pry open the closet door in black America.

Book Review - Coming Up from the Down Low : The Journey to Acceptance, Healing, and Honest Love

The dramatic follow-up to the controversial bestseller that has all of America talking…

In his first book, On the Down Low, J. L. King introduced readers to the deceptive underground world of the “down low” (DL), the subculture of men leading straight lives while secretly sleeping with other men. In that first book, King’s own life was exhibit A—he lived for years as a DL man and was able to expose this lifestyle with unique authority.

In this blockbuster new book, King takes readers to the next level in his exploration of the down-low world by answering the most common questions from the thousands of people he’s met while traveling the country. He provides more in-depth information about the lives of men on the DL, dispels the most common myths, and addresses the most frequently asked question of all: What are the signs? But more than that, he tells of his own transformation over the last year, as he’s moved into a more honest evaluation of his own life and the lives of other men on the DL who are trying to emerge from their web of deceit. And he courageously points to the urgent problems in our communities that drive men into such dangerous and reckless lives and keep them there.

Filled with fascinating stories from the men who have lived on the down low and the women who have struggled through it with them, Coming Up from the Down Low shines more light on a phenomenon that has touched the lives of too many. It’s a vital call for greater love, tolerance, and forgiveness in our individual lives and in the lives of our communities, and an inspiration to all of us to embrace the liberating power of the truth.

“The source of my expertise on this subject is, quite simply, my own life. I’ve lived this and been struggling down the road of understanding my entire life. Since the publication of the first book I’ve made further progress down that road, helped along by the thousands of you who responded. The insights I’ve gotten have transformed my understanding of this phenomenon and transformed my life. I want to share those insights with you now, to help you better understand the down-low phenomenon, yes, but also to help you better understand the potential liberating power of honesty, acceptance, and healing in our personal lives and in the life of our community.” —from the Introduction

Book Review - My Husband Is Gay: A Woman's Survival Guide

Carol Grever and her husband, Jim, were high school sweethearts who married in their early twenties. Thirty years and two children later, Jim announced to his wife that he was homosexual. A fundamentalist Christian, he had been leading a double life for years. In an effort to process her pain and confusion, Carol Grever sought out other heterosexual women, of all ages, ethnicities, and educational backgrounds, who were married to gay men. The stories she uncovered examine these women’s coping strategies and form the basis of this manual for healing.